“Just as a nursing mother cares for her children, so we cared for you. Because we loved you so much, we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well. (We are) encouraging, comforting and urging you to live lives worthy of God, who calls you into His kingdom and glory.”
1 Thessalonians 2:7-8, 12
Mentoring is a key aspect of the Great Commission, because we are to “make” disciples and not just “witness to” outsiders. It also helps those we mentor to grow spiritually and learn to live a life of faith. Jesus was a teacher, counselor, and guide to all of His disciples. He also developed a mentoring relationship with them. He had a particularly close mentoring relationship with three of His disciples – Peter, James, and John.
According to the dictionary, a mentor is a wise and trusted counselor or teacher. God created us to need mentors, including our parents, teachers, bosses and pastors. The Apostle Paul mentored young Timothy (1st Timothy Chapter 4). As Paul demonstrates, mentoring is a committed one-to-one discipleship relationship, an investment in another person’s life, a passing on of faith in Jesus, and an apprenticeship where both people respect and rely on each other. Mentoring also enables spiritual reproduction, so that the mentee can in turn mentor others and pass the Christian faith from one generation to another. As Paul also wrote to Timothy, “And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable people who will also be qualified to teach others.” (2 Timothy 2:2)
There are some basic principles of mentoring that are very important if it is to be effective. First of all, there must be Commitment by both the mentor and mentee. This means taking on the responsibility to develop the one-to-one relationship, investing time in the process, and pledging to completely follow God’s Word and God’s Will. Second, there must be Accountability. There needs to be openness to each other, a willingness to be repentant, and an agreement to “answer to” the other person. Third, there should be Confidentiality. All personal information must be confidential unless specified otherwise. If mutually agreed upon, some information can be shared to build up the body of believers. Fourth, mentoring must be Voluntary. Each person must be willing to enter into the relationship and give it their time. Either person can discontinue it if desired.
Additionally, mentoring should be person-to-person with the same gender to avoid any romantic temptations. It can be someone you know, or don’t know, and will often happen as a result of God’s call or prompting. Mentors should not mentor more than three people at a time and also must use the Bible as the primary tool.
Here are the key steps to mentoring:
1.Determine Who to Mentor
After prayer and discerning God’s guidance, select a person to mentor. Have an exploratory first meeting to discuss the mentoring process. Pray about it together.
2. Determine a mentoring process
Decide on when and where to meet and agree on the Bible as the guidebook for your meetings. Have a second meeting to discuss and take notes on life issues, topics, or needs. Plan with each other the schedule and topics. If the person is not a believer yet, work on evangelism first.
3. Meet regularly
Keep to the agreed upon schedule but remain flexible to adjust the schedule as needed. Have brief encounters to catch-up and provide encouragement.
4. Assess and work on the needs
Take notes and collect more information related to childhood, young adulthood, and current life situation. Review and discuss your notes together. Then, determine their needs and encourage their spiritual growth. As Paul wrote, “But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it, and how from infancy you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.” (2 Timothy 3:14-15).
5. Set goals
Goals should be worked on one at a time, or only a few at a time. All goals should be researched in the Scriptures for guidance and help. Do this together and prepare some suggested goals for them ahead of time. Pray together about the goals and listen to the Holy Spirit for guidance. Agree on any “homework” due before the next meeting. Be testimonial by sharing the spiritual growth taking place with others and witnessing the work of the Holy Spirit in your lives.
When should the mentoring relationship end? It can end as God leads (and is agreed upon) or when the mentee is capable of mentoring another person. We need to ‘make disciples’ who will ‘make other disciples’! It can also end when life situations change.
Every Christian should have a mentor and be a mentor all of their life! We are all called to make disciples (Matthew 28:19) so that God’s Kingdom grows!
(From Chapter 11 in our Discipleship for Church Leaders™ Training Manual, ©2015.)
I read the article on mentoring, and found very good and helpful. God bless.